Thanks for all who have commented and prayed in the past few weeks. I am no longer in the running for the position I interviewed for two weeks ago. It is a real disappointment, in that it is an incredible church, a great staff, a growing area, and right in line with me theologically. The Sr. Pastor feels that they want someone who has more experience in preaching week to week, someone more refined in this than I am at this point in my life. I understand what he is saying, and trust that he knows what his church needs. It’s one of those points where I accept that he is right, but it hurts nonetheless. I hate rejection. I hate failing. I suppose most people fall into those two categories, but I do especially. The multiplying factor is the heat that burns within me to serve in the local church. Yes, I understand volunteering (I’ve been doing that for 3.5 years!) but I would really like to move into a more permanent position. Somewhere we could develop some roots. Somewhere I could have more skin in the game. I want to be used by God. I can’t say that my faithfulness is being put to the test, but it is definately frustrating. I have made some great contacts in the past few years, and I deeply hope they begin to pay dividends soon. I talked with another pastor friend at the Leadership Summit and he gave me a heads up that some things will be coming open in his church in the next year or so. This is a man I deeply respect, and a church doing great things for God/with God. I’m beginning to approach the point thought where I don’t know that I can get my hope up. I don’t want to become jaded, I want to stay fresh, and have that fire keep burning within me. It is a scary time knowing so much in my life will likely change in the next 12 months. But I will continue to put my faith in Christ, and will trust Him to light and lead me down the right path. Honestly, I don’t know if I could find my way at the moment with a GPS unit, guide dogs, and a trail of bread crumbs. But wherever God leads, I will be happy to serve.

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